Guaranteed Picks for NFL Week 3

I love the NFL. Week 2 was everything I do love about it. No fewer than three games that nearly everyone had on their slates as ‘gimmes’ fell through. Remember that old saying “That’s why they play the games”? Now we remember why. Chicago over Pittsburgh? Jay Cutler’s mother wouldn’t have picked that one. The Bengals over the Packers at Lambeau, a week after 58 scoreless minutes against Denver? Houston in a shootout win over that defense in Tennessee? And those are just the big ones! Brady and the Pats getting shut down (as fashionable a pick as it was, you can’t tell me you saw that coming).

That being said, it obviously wasn’t a great week for picks, but it was a blast.

On to business; I’ve added a few things this week; first off, because I like the damn things, I’m using some of the retro team logos. And after the picks for week 3, you will find my results from the previous week, with a look at my picks, how I did (no doubt those who find my picks, done purely in the interest of fun and love of football offensive will enjoy picking them to pieces. Apparently anyone not asking for a credit card number while making picks is a douche.) And a bit of a grade. Feel free to comment; I live for the debate.

Finally, I will say thank you to the surprising number of people who are reading my pointless picks and sharing the feedback. What good is football if we don’t argue about it?

So, here we go…. My picks for week 3 of the NFL season.

Cleveland Browns (0-2) at Baltimore Ravens (2-0)

I still think that one day we will look back on Brady Quinn’s career and chuckle at the Browns’ early ineptness. We’re aways from that day, though. Meanwhile, the Ravens are looking like every bit the playoff team they were last year. That game saving play from Ray Lewis at the end? Epic.

Predictions: This one might get ugly quick. Ravens 38-6

Tennessee Titans (0-2) at New York Jets (2-0)

If someone had asked you before the season which of these teams would be winless and which would be undefeated, I’m pretty sure none of us would have tagged the Jets as the 2-0 team. Yet here they are. Tennessee has been a bit unlucky to date. If they don’t start winning, will we see the return of Mr. Young?

Predictions: The Titans woes continue. The Jets defense might really be that good. Jets 21-17

New York Giants (2-0) at Tampa Bay Buccaneers (0-2)

I’ve been hollering from the rooftops that this is the year we realize just how good Eli is. Maybe after Sunday, that’s a bit clearer. The Bucs are a team without an identity. They aren’t that bad, they just aren’t that good.

Predictions: Eli and the no names keep rolling. Giants 27-13

Green Bay Packers (1-1) at St. Louis Rams (0-2)

The Packers’ defense will get better. The O line, however, is awful. McCarthy needs to come up with a strategy that has Rodgers getting the ball out quicker. (and presumably spending less time on his backside). The Rams are just painful to see.

Predictions: If you need a week to iron out your offense, it’s good to play the Rams. Packers 31-17

Kansas City Chiefs (0-2) at Philadelphia Eagles (1-1)

The Chiefs just aren’t very good at all. The Eagles will be OK, even if McNabb isn’t. Kolb was no match for Brees, but he can more than handle the KC.

Predictions: Philly will handle business at home. Eagles 38-17

Atlanta Falcons (2-0) at New England Patriots (1-1)

Does anyone remember the last time the Pats (with Brady) looked this… human? I think they still had this on their helmet then? But it appears the dynasty has run it’s course. Atlanta seems to be on the elevator going up passing the one going down. We all knew Gonzalez would make the offense better, but geez.

Predictions: The torch is passed. Ryan brings the Falcons to Foxboro and handles the Pats. Falcons 27-20

Washington Redskins (1-1) at Detroit Lions (0-2)

The Lions looked… dare I say it? Respectable against the Vikings! They led at the half, and held AP to a pedestrian 92 yards (27 on his 3rd qtr TD run). The Redskins looked anemic; I can’t think, offhand, of the last time a team looked so bad in a victory.

Prediction: Stand up and rejoice… the streak ends here. Lions 24-21

San Fransisco 49ers (2-0) at Minnesota Vikings (2-0)

Everyone is happy in Minnesota. AP is AP, Favre is 2 games in and not a single pick… But here come the Niners. Now we see what old no. 4 really has left in the tank.

Predictions: We see the old Favre… the one that at times drove cheeseheads nuts… this week against a good D. 49ers 31-21

Jacksonville Jaguars (0-2) at Houston Texans (1-1)

The Texans are apparently just as schizophrenic this year. The jags look like a very pedestrian team.

Predictions: An up week for the Texans at home. Houston 27-13

New Orleans Saints (2-0) at Buffalo Bills (1-1)

The Bills are up and comers, much to everyone’s surprise. But the Saints are a Juggernaut. Brees should break Brady’s and Marino’s records this year.

Predictions: The Saints light it up again. New Orleans 38-21

Chicago Bears (1-1) at Seattle Seahawks (1-1)

No one saw this week’s win over Pittsburgh coming. And Cutler looked good. His Achilles heel has always been poor decision making, but he looked like he was in command against the Steelers. I’m far from jumping on the bandwagon, but I was duly impressed. The Seahawks are good with Hasselback, average with Wallace.

Predictions: Cutler will be just good enough. Bears 23-21

Pittsburgh Steelers (1-1) at Cincinnati Bengals (1-1)

Don’t be ready to jump back on the Bengals bandwagon, either. The Packers’ O line was non existent, and the defense is still learning. The Steelers won’t miss a beat.

Predictions: The road back to respectability will be short lived. The Steelers will be pissed. Pittsburgh 31-10

Miami Dolphins (0-1) at San Diego Chargers (1-1)

Rivers found his swagger against the Ravens, but it wasn’t enough. That Ray Lewis classic is the kind of play that can take the wind out of a season. The ‘Fins suddenly find themselves in a good division again. They will need this one far more than the Chargers.

Predictions: Desire wins out over talent. Dolphins 24-20

Denver Broncos (2-0) at Oakland Raiders (1-1)

The Broncos are the worst 2-0 team in years. The Raiders could actually (gasp!) claim first place with a win.

Predictions: JaMarcus Russell looks awful at times. He doesn’t have to be that good for this one. Good thing. Raiders 20-17

Indianapolis Colts (1-0) at Arizona Cardinals (1-1)

Turns out all Kurt Warner needed was a little Anquan Boldin in his life. Peyton is still Peyton.

Predictions: A shootout in the desert. Colts 38-31

Carolina Panthers (0-2) at Dallas Cowboys (1-1)

Carolina… didn’t you used to be…. contenders? The Cowboys are Romo’s team; as he goes, they go. He’ll be looking for redemption this week.

Predictions: He’ll find it. Cowboys 35-10

Looking Back at Week 2: The Good, the Bad and the Ugly

Carolina Panthers (0-1) at Atlanta Falcons (1-0)

The Panthers laid a massive egg in their own back yard, while Atlanta efficiently handled their business against Miami. Tony Gonzalez has made phenom Ryan Better.

Prediction: The Falcons will continue to show us how wrong we all were about Carolina. Falcons 21-13

Result: Atlanta 28 Carolina 20. Got the spread exactly. All Pro.

Minnesota Vikings (1-0) at Detroit Lions (0-1)

Adrian Peterson is ridiculous. I was incredulous at first; could Favre live with quietly handing the ball to AP 30 times a game? So far, so Good. Expect the Vikings to experiment more with the passing game, and build confidence for the young Viking receivers. Being Detroit, it is just a walk through.

Prediction: Should be over by halftime. Vikings 38-14

Results: Minnesota 27 Detroit 13. This one was a bit closer for the first half than anyone thought. Apparently it’s been so long since the Lions won that they didn’t realize you have to do it for 2 halves. Favre did throw more, but it wasn’t quite a walkthrough. Good.

Cincinnati Bengals (0-1) at Green Bay Packers (1-0)

Every year, Cincy is a chic preseason pick to finally ‘break out’. And every year they find new and innovative ways to suck. Aaron Rodgers took a huge step against the Bears; he was an all pro caliber quarterback last year… until the final two minutes. With the game on the line, time after time, he blew it. Not this time.

Prediction: Expect Rodgers to put it up early and often, with success. Big confidence game. Packers 35-10

Results: Cincinnati 31 Green Bay 24. My only comfory here is that everyone else was wrong, too. You have to feel bad for Aaron Rodgers… the poor guy has all the pieces in place for a championship caliber team. Except for an offensive line. And a running game. And a defense. Huge props to Ochocinco for coming through on his guarantee. Bad.

Houston Texans (0-1) at Tennessee Titans (0-1)

Houston may never be any good. They should be good. They have weapons. But, again, they appear to be just a bit short. The Titans, meanwhile, are exactly what they are every year. (When will people realize how well coached this team is?)

Prediction: The Texans will get shut down for the second straight week. Titans 17-7

Results: Houston 34 Tennessee 31. Did anyone outside of Texas even consider picking Houston? Did anyone in Texas even think of it? And an offensive shootout? Please. Bad.

Oakland Raiders (0-1) at Kansas City Chiefs (0-1)

The Raiders are obviously better. The Chiefs are a little better. Neither is good yet. Booooring.

Prediction: Raiders will sneak one in KC. Raiders 24-21

Results: Oakland 13 Kansas City 10. Not quite as many points as I guessed, but I picked Raiders by three, and the Raiders won by three. All Pro.

New England Patriots (1-0) at New York Jets (1-0)

This is suddenly a much more interesting matchup that anyone thought it would be a week ago. But you have to figure the Bilichek will have the Pats ready for rookie Sanchez.

Prediction: New England is not Houston. Pats 27-14

Results: New York Jets 16 New England 9. And sometimes I just eat my words. I don’t think anyone thought the Jets D would shut Brady and crew down like this. Ugly.

New Orleans Saints (1-0) at Philadelphia Eagles (1-0)

And this one is far less interesting than anyone would have thought a week ago. It should still be a fun game to watch, and Brees will show that those numbers will come against anyone.

Prediction: No McNabb will open the door for New Orleans. Saints 31-28

Results: New Orleans 48 Philadelphia 22. A bit more of a blow out than I figured. Dead on about the Saints putting big numbers up on anyone (so far). On a side note, I think the question as to Kevin Kolb’s readiness as an NFL starting QB has been answered. Good.

St. Louis Rams (0-1) at Washington Redskins (0-1)

The Rams may be this year’s Lions. (or they would be if the Lions weren’t this years Lions) The Redskins are a .500 team at best, but they should look good here.

Prediction: Happy hogs this week. Redskins 28-10.

Results: Washington 9 St. Louis 7. Everything right except for the ‘Skins looking good. Good.

Arizona Cardinals (0-1) at Jacksonville Jaguars (0-1)

People forget that the Cardinals were just a 9-7 team last year that caught a Cinderella breeze. The Jags are the kind of physical team that tends to beat up on the Arizonas of the world.

Prediction: Jags too much for the Cards; Super Bowl slump is in full effect. Jags 24-20

Results: Arizona 31 Jacksonville 17. OK, I just completely misfired here. Bad

Tampa Bay Buccaneers (0-1) at Buffalo Bills (0-1)

The Bucs simply aren’t that good this year. And they’re so boring. The Bills, though… They should have beaten the Patriots. Trent Edwards is still Trent Edwards, and who is the guy at running back? But somehow, they looked good…

Prediction: The Bills almost beat the Pats. They will beat the Bucs. Bills 23-13

Results: Buffalo 33 Tampa Bay 20. A few more points than I thought, but I said Bills by 10 and they won by 13. Good.

Seattle Seahawks (1-0) at San Francisco 49ers (1-0)

This is where we’ll find out if the Niners are for real. Seattle looked good against the hapless Rams; it won’t be that easy in the Bay.

Prediction: The Niners are, in fact, for real. They won’t just win, they’ll do so decisively. 49ers 27-10

Results: San Fransisco 23 Seattle 10. Can’t get much closer than that. All Pro.

Pittsburgh Steelers (1-0) at Chicago Bears (0-1)

The Steelers are a great football team. The Bears aren’t even a good football team. Think Cutler looked bad against the Packers?

Prediction: With Urlacher running the show, it might have been competitive. Steelers 27-7

Results: Chicago 17 Pittsburgh 14. Jay Cutler’s mother wouldn’t have picked this. But she would be proud; even without Polamalu this is a very good defense. And Cutler was impressive. Fear not, Steeler fans. The steelers are a team that will stumble occasionally in the regular season, but there still isn’t another team so perfectly built for playoff success. Nolan will have them forgetting this by Monday. Bad.

Baltimore Ravens (1-0) at San Diego Chargers (1-0)

The Ravens offense is potent. (how weird is it hearing that?) The Chargers are getting old; it would appear that their window of opportunity has closed.

Prediction: San Diego used to be a scary place to play. It won’t be this week. Ravens 28-20

Results: Baltimore 31 San Diego 26. Hit this one on the head, too. Good.

Cleveland Browns (0-1) at Denver Broncos (1-0)

Another one of those games between two not so good teams; it should ironically be a good game. Now that the Browns have ended their touchdown drought (what was it, 2 or 3 years?) a bit of the pressure will be off of Brady Quinn.

Prediction: Quinn will have his first good game as a starter, and pick up his first win. Browns 23-21

Results: Denver 27 Cleveland 6. I keep thinking the Browns have finally turned the corner. I keep thinking wrong. Ugly.

New York Giants (1-0) at Dallas Cowboys (1-0)

Game of the week. This is the year we find out that both of these quarterbacks are amongst the NFL’s elite. Romo a bit more so, if only because he has better receivers.

Prediction: Romo outguns Eli. Cowboys 35-31

Results: New York Giants 33 Dallas 31. Took a lot of heat for this pick. Shootout… check. Awful close on the score… Eli just got the ball last. Close enough to earn a Good.

Indianapolis Colts (1-0) at Miami Dolphins (0-1)

The Dolphins were just ugly against Atlanta; last year’s big overachievers may just have come back down to earth. We don’t know how much the Colts miss Dungy yet; time will tell.

Prediction: The Dolphins aren’t as good as we thought. The Colts are still the Colts. Indy 28-13

There you have it. Enjoy the weekend; may week 3 be as exciting as week 2 was!

**The Miami and Indy results will be posted after the game.